DIY

DIY.  You know the acronym for do it yourself?  It sends shivers down my back.

I leave for Leander and Austin on a sunny March Monday morning in the company of my beloved daughter Andrea and granddaughters Addison and Finley.  We are off to visit our beloved Jenny and Michael.

No signs of trouble on the home front before we leave.  Nothing to be concerned about.  I kiss my husband goodbye and tell him I will miss him. 

When we return on Wednesday, the pool is turning an appropriate color for Sunday's St. Patrick's Day. 

What happened, my husband?

I'm fixing the pump.  I think a pipe is clogged. 

That would explain why the backyard is full of holes, exposed PVC pipe and miscellaneous shovels and other digging apparatus.  And hack saw.  The dreaded hack saw.

Thursday, Friday, Saturday.  No luck.  No solution to the non-pumping pump.  Now the pool water is definitely green.  Dark green. 

Paul, god bless him, still is optimistic.  Optimistic!  He will find the clog, destroy it, and regain supremacy over his backyard. 

Sunday afternoon.  Paul comes to me and says he cut into a copper pipe and it is gushing water, filling up the hole rapidly.  I wonder if we have flood insurance.

Turns out the copper piping was hidden under a PVC pipe Paul was sawing.  No one could have seen this pipe, for real.  It was hugging the PVC pipe, undetectable.  Until Paul hacksawed through it.

After multiple attempts to figure out how and why this was happening, including shutting off our house water supply, nothing would stop the gush from the mystery copper pipe.

We call the plumber (Sunday afternoon, ouch).  He has the same luck as we did.  None.  He checked the neighbor's water meter and concluded we had not sabotaged their supply.  He said we had to call the city. 

A very nice man from the city water department shows up later Sunday afternoon and concludes this is some kind of rogue copper pipe.  Why is it gushing water?  No idea.  So the plan is to drain the pool below the level of this copper pipe and see what happens.

It worked!!!  No more gushing!!!  Whew.  That was a load off.  But wait.  Now we have a partially drained pool, the water is now looking more purple than green, and the pump still is not fixed.

Is Paul dissuaded?  Heck no.  He is KING of the DIY's. 

To his credit he figures out that the water-gushing copper pipe carried electrical wiring to the pool light, which hasn't worked in 15 years - because the wiring is soaking wet! 

Paul's got an idea.  He will clamp and cut and paste and ... whatever.  He gives it his DIY best.  He also starts a FIRE.  A fire that he has to dump dirt on, which luckily was in great supply from previously dugup yard.

No one can say Paul didn't give this one his all.  He fought to the bitter end.  This Friday we have a company coming to give us an estimate on pool repair.

Please be kind to Paul this week.